Adding Neutral to the Gears of Touch – A Practical Touch Framework for Increased Regulation, Connection, and Pleasure

 Adding Neutral to the Gears of Touch – 

A Practical Touch Framework for Increased Regulation, Connection, and Pleasure

Course Description

This workshop provides therapists with tools to guide clients beyond traditional performance-focused sexual models by expanding Dr. Barry McCarthy's established 5 Gears of Touch model with the crucial Gear Zero of  Neutral/Regulating Touch. This zero gear emphasizes using touch for nervous system safety and co-regulation, establishing a necessary foundation for intimacy and reducing performance anxiety.

Drawing from McCarthy's work (2019), this presentation explores six distinct types of touch—from Regulating to Intercourse—that foster emotional safety, connection, and desire. Attendees will be introduced to the CPR (Calm, Pleasant, Relaxed) communication model and receive concrete, culturally sensitive strategies for teaching clients how to negotiate boundaries and express needs across all gears.

The training equips therapists with a practical framework and actionable tools to support couples and individuals navigating intimacy barriers, major life transitions (e.g., pregnancy, chronic illness, and aging), and diverse relationship contexts (including monogamous, polyamorous, and LGBTQ+ relationships). The ultimate goal is to increase therapist competence in coaching clients toward a more resilient, pleasure-focused, and differentiated sexual life.

Target Audience

Sex therapists, couples’ therapists, and mental health professionals who work with couples, individuals seeking to improve intimacy and connection.

Training is suited for clinicians at all experience levels interested in practical frameworks for teaching about touch and communication in relationships.

Training Purpose

To provide therapists with a structured, evidence-based approach for understanding and guiding clients through six distinct gears of touch—(0) neutral/regulating, (1) affectionate, (2) sensual, (3) playful, (4) erotic, and (5) intercourse.

To deepen practitioner competence in fostering healthy communication, emotional safety, and differentiated intimacy in diverse relationship contexts.

Limitations, Risks, and Benefits

Limitations: 

This training is educational and should not replace direct clinical supervision or tailored intervention for complex trauma or high conflict couples.

The framework may require adaptation for clients with sensory processing challenges, cultural differences, or trauma histories.

Risks: 

Engaging in touch-based interventions can activate emotional discomfort or resistance, especially for clients with trauma or boundary violations.

Misapplication of concepts without clinical judgment could inadvertently retraumatize or alienate certain clients.

Benefits: 

Therapists will gain concrete tools for normalizing, differentiating, and safely negotiating various kinds of touch.

Improved client outcomes in emotional closeness, pleasure, and relationship satisfaction due to increased communication and attuned intimacy practices.

Cultural Sensitivity

Training emphasizes cultural humility and the importance of honoring each client’s relational norms, beliefs, and boundaries.

Guidance will be provided for adapting touch frameworks to reflect the diverse values, family systems, and traditions present in different populations.

Practitioners are encouraged to assess for and respect variations in touch norms across gender, religion, ethnicity, and sexual orientation.

3 Objectives

By the end of this training, participants will be able to:

1. Identify and describe the six distinct gears of touch, including their functions in relational health. (AASECT CKA: I and E)

2. Employ effective communication techniques to facilitate open dialogue about touch, boundaries, and intimacy with clients. (AASECT CKA: O)

3. Develop culturally sensitive interventions for teaching clients about healthy, adaptable touch practices across life transitions and diverse backgrounds. (AASECT CKA: C)

Relevance

Physical and emotional touch is foundational to relational and sexual wellbeing. Therapists are often called upon to help clients navigate differences and barriers around touch, intimacy, and communication. This training uniquely equips practitioners to provide practical, adaptable frameworks—grounded in recent clinical insights—for elevating the quality of connection, safety, and pleasure in the lives of those they serve.

What You’ll Walk Away With

 A clear, actionable framework for identifying and teaching the six gears of touch 

 Practical language and scripts for helping clients communicate about needs and boundaries 

 Tools for addressing barriers to intimacy (e.g., life transitions, faith concerns, vulnerability) 

 Exercises and protocols (like the sixsecond kiss and 20second hug) to use in your own practice 

 Creative activities to foster joy, safety, and deeper connection between partners 

Why This Training Matters

Physical touch is foundational yet often misunderstood in intimate relationships. When you can help clients differentiate and request appropriate forms of touch, you empower them to:

•  Build trust and safety 

•  Rekindle affection and sensuality 

•  Navigate life changes with resilience 

•  Foster meaningful sexual and emotional connection 

This workshop will give you the structure and language you need to make a tangible difference in your clinical work.

Meet Your Presenter: Mike Fuller, M.Ed, LCSW.

Mike Fuller (he/him) is a LCSW in Utah and Idaho. 

Mike was a full-time religious educator for 20 years and is known for his practical, client-centered approach. He describes this career change from religious education to sex therapy as “the best two years”. Mike is Gottman informed (Level 1), trauma informed (Evergreen Certified Trauma Professional), and in the process to become a certified sex therapist specializing in couples intimacy, communication, and sexual health. Mike is training with The Modern Sex Therapy Institute and The Healing Group Institute for his sex therapy training. 

Mike's work is deeply rooted in LGBTQ+ affirmative care and identity development, informed by over three years’ experience at Flourish Therapy Inc, and significant training with the LGBTQ Affirmative Therapists Guild of Utah and Loving Beyond Understanding.

  Mike brings together evidence-based techniques with warmth, humor, and deep clinical insight. He is passionate about helping therapists translate theory into actionable, compassionate strategies. Mike enjoys chocolate and softball. He and his wife of 25 years live in south west Idaho and enjoy kayaking and hiking. They are the parents of two adult sons and former foster parents. 

References;

McCarthy, B., & McCarthy, E. (2019). Enhancing couple sexuality: Creating an intimate and erotic bond. Routledge.